Let's Take a Tour of My Pants

So today I made pumpkin pie for Nathan's class. Here's what I learned: use the stove at school.

I had made chocolate chip cookies in the oven earlier in the day (at school) for Emma's class. But as the day was drawing to a close, I saw that I'd never have enough time to make pumpkin pie in Nathan's class if I didn't preheat the oven at home first. So I rushed to Nathan's class with all the ingredients, got together with Nathan's class, dumped a bunch of ingredients together (and suddenly everyone wants to help you - open cans, stir, sift, things the kids would never want to do at home)and we made our very watery pumpkin pie.

Then I had to carry it to the car, sloshing all around. Then I had to drive home holding a pie, with one pie at my feet. Of course I turned left and half the pie slimes over the side by my brake pedal. Dammit! Cursing the pie. Running a stopsign so I wouldn't have to slime the other side of my car. Then I tip the pie I'm holding and spill all down my shirt and sleeve.

I get home, I put one pie in the oven, go back to the car and get the other pie. Put it in. Go back to the car (all abandoned with doors open) and scrape the pie goo on my car floor out onto the driveway where it looks like pie vomit. But hey the car smells like Christmas.

Then I make the monumental decision not to change my pants and shirt. You know, it's like 2 pm. My day is pretty much over. It's not going to get CLEANER. You know? The pie goo starts turning into pie hard, (isn't that a Bruce Willis movie?) and then the pies are coming out of the oven and rushing back to school with tiny cups of pie for all the kids and everyone eats and no one cares about my pants.

By the end of the day, after dinner, sitting by the fire with toys strewn around, kids strewn around, rice and broccoli, I'm looking at the map of my pants and feeling fulfilled. I wore something well, this day was worn well. I can see it all over me.