I'm a Peeper

I just have to write about my chicken for a second. I have a bunch of other posts to write, like how crappy the parking is at the Griffith Park Observatory (you have to park on JUPITER and walk in), but the thing I keep thinking about is that little chicken out in the backyard, there on the nest.

This little grey hen wants to be a mom so bad she's sitting on this nest full of eggs for 25 days now. It takes about 21 days for an egg to hatch, so last night I went out there with a flashlight (I know you've all done this, shut up), and lifted up her butt to "candle" the eggs. Did pioneers used to use an actual candle? Is this why it's called that? According to "Backyardchicken.com" (yes, poultry nerds), you hold a flashlight under the egg and you can see membranes and chickeny things if it's a fertile egg. I put the flashlight under there and one by one, I took out 6 eggs showing nothing. That's how I ended up by my trash can out back at midnight, scared and cracking each egg, hoping not to see a baby chick in there screeching I'M NOT DONE COOKING!!!! No fertile eggs, though, all just runny and gross regular eggs that have been sat on for almost a month. For no reason.

Now I don't know if the rooster is just a bad shot, or if the hen went out partying one night and forgot to get a baby sitter (babysitter, heh) and they got too cold, or too hot, or whatever it is that doesn't grow chicks. I just know the odds are pretty bad if not even one is a hatcher.

My question is, the hen is still on the nest, giving me this hopeful, slightly desperate look, as I remove the eggs one by one. Might I keep just the one, she whispers in a Frances Hodgsen Burnett way. Anyway, last night I snuck in 8 fresh eggs, and crossed her legs over them and crossed my fingers and she settled back down, but my wondering is, just how long can a woodchuck chuck. She's been sitting already for 25 DAYS. That's longer than people waited in line for THE BEATLES. Will she make it another 21? Backyardchicken says sometimes the will of a little hen is pretty strong. And sometimes they just get up and check out of the hotel.

I hope she'll get her baby. I'm going to keep treating her lavishly, with old corn and pizza crusts, and leaving her alone to sit and feel hopeful on her sitting. I hope she gets her little peepers.